Dear Ones! I’m about to do some more traveling and so I’m posting Saturday and instead of Sunday. Save the date for June 21 at 10am for the Solstice gathering!
Shiloh
Excerpt:
Patriarchy is almost the easiest way to describe it.
But let me just remind you that patriarchy really isn't about men.
Patriarchy uses men as well as women.
We are all tools in the toolbox of patriarchy.
You know this already, don't you?
We do know this.
In Starhawk's substack post from today on her substack called
Men: You Need Feminism, she says this,
"...we think of patriarchy as a system that allocates power to men over women and
anyone who doesn't fit either gender,
and indeed it does to men's benefit."
But in its origins and at its core, patriarchy has a different purpose.
Patriarchy is a set of beliefs designed to shape men's psyches.
so that they allow themselves to be controlled by other men and to fight and to die
and to kill for other men's aims and objectives.
Like usual,
I'm not saying it's all men because women participate as well,
but by in large,
the power-over structures were created by those who are male-bodied who exist
inside of a belief system easily called patriarchy.
FULL TRANSCRIPT - not edited yet
Maybe we're all fighting ghost stories. Maybe those ghost stories are from our ancestors, reminding us not to do what they have done. Jonathan McCloud, who was once a soldier in the Air Force in armed combat, said that if anyone ever could smell what war smells like, all war would end.
But instead of all war ending, wars are sparking up everywhere. There are more armed conflicts in the world than ever before, and with one being added yesterday that is rocking the world and putting more and more lives in danger And for what? For what? I'm searching my heart today. I'm trying to find honest words within.
I don't say honest words because I think I might lie about something. I mean honest in the sense... Like something true, something courageous, something of the heart, like a core feeling, something I truly feel and that's worth sharing at all. I'm going to try. I don't know if it's worth anything at all.
But I know that during these times, we need to practice being quiet when we need to be quiet, which I've been doing plenty of. And also speaking when we need to speak. Waiting for something to say that's worthwhile, either for the storyteller or for those listening. Every dominant, violent, warring action that we're seeing right now is the result of over 8 to 10,000 years of power over culture, conditioning, and colonization. I say power over. But I also mean patriarchy. Patriarchy is a part of the power over structure. It's a belief system within the power over structure. But it's not the only part of it.
Patriarchy is almost the easiest way to describe it. But let me just remind you that patriarchy really isn't about men. Patriarchy uses men as well as women. We are all tools in the toolbox of patriarchy. You know this already, don't you? We do know this. In Starhawk's post from today on her substack called Men, You Need Feminism, she says this, "...we think of patriarchy as a system that allocates power to men over women and anyone who doesn't fit either gender, and indeed it does to men's benefit." But in its origins and at its core, patriarchy has a different purpose. Patriarchy is a set of beliefs designed to shape men's psyches, so that they allow themselves to be controlled by other men and to fight and to die and to kill for other men's aims and objectives.
Like usual, I'm not saying it's all men because women participate as well, but by and large, the power over structures were created by those who are male-bodied who exist inside of a belief system easily called patriarchy. so what we're seeing today for those of us who study history and archaeomythology meaning the study of place and the study of place demonstrates that weapons aren't actually that old less than 10 000 years old so what we're seeing is the impact ofthings like invented borders because we're all one people Enforced scarcity because there is enough food and shelter and water for everyone. Territorial dominance because we just can't seem to stay in our own space and need to take other people's spaces over. Colonization of people's cultures, languages, food, music, stories, late stage capitalism, late stage extractive capitalism you know all of this these are versions of patriarchy and can easily just be identified as a form of colonization which is literally to take over someone or something else to colonize but you already knew all that didn't you
Recently in conversation with a Native Indian of the area known as Santa Fe
I got to hear the whole story of what happened to his people from his perspective. It's as if he believes, even though he's had chances to make a life work for him, everything was stacked against him, including the placement of alcohol near the reservation. Even though both of his parents got a college education, he's having a hard time just getting by. We went to hear him because he was singing some of the deepest ceremonial songs I could even imagine hearing on the Santa Fe Plaza. He said that sometimes his friends accuse him of giving his medicine away, but he said sharing medicine is healing, and so he shared it with us.
He told his story and was completely present, like cognizant of every part of it, even though he admittedly said he was on drugs. I mean, his metacognition, thinking about thinking about his part was so clear and the persistent defeat of generations present within him.
It's like he just knows and that's patriarchy and he's the victim of it and he knows it and he doesn't know what to do about it, but he's inside of it. But he said, he's trying. As he sat there, talking to us, he made a dream catcher, removing the cellulose from the branches.
We were there for about a half an hour as we watched. I was uncertain how to be about the whole thing. And in the end, he hugged us. Now we're wondering what to do. What's the appropriate thing to do with the dream catcher?
This morning, I'm headed to a ranch where I'm going to be offering intentional creativity to women healing from intergenerational trauma through a docuseries that you'll be hearing about in the future. I'm just wondering, does this dream catcher go on the altar? Do I bury it in the ground? Do I take it home and bring it to Wildwater Creek?
How do I honor his story and his fingerprints that went in to that dream catcher with its off center circle? Here's the really wild thing about these times. The thing that baffles me is that these are ghost stories. These are invented stories. Someone made them up long ago. They're things that dominant men made up to dominate others, but dominant men inside of dominant structures. It's all made up. There's no ounce of truth in it. None in terms of how the story goes, but the impacts of the stories are real. So if we can make this distinction, this is such an important part of consciousness. The stories that harm are invented, but the impacts are real.
So if we talk about like food safety and scarcity, the story that there's not enough food is invented because there is. But the impact that people are starving is real. Stories invented impact is real. We've got to be able to hold both in order to not go mad with the pure insanity of these times.
The actual impacts of racism, sexism, classism, and colonization are real, but the stories are completely false. Is any man better than any woman? No. Is a white person better than a black person? Is any class above another class? No. Are we all created equal? Yes. Are we all distinct but equal? Yes.
That is what is true, but that is not the story we're living. We're fighting ghost stories with our entire lives, and it doesn't need to be this way. The warring men... likely don't even remember or know why they feel the way they do and where it all began and what it's costing them, the intimacy of their families, the intimacy of their relationship with their food and water and shelter. The great sorrow is that this could be paradise, would be paradise, is paradise, was paradise, this place, this beautiful earth, if we chose for it to be. But we won't. Most of us won't.
And that's why one of my practices is to sit in nature and remember and know that it is paradise and that in each moment I can appreciate it that way. whether that's a sunset or the full strawberry moon or some tiny little wildflowers or a little bunny that's been visiting every day when I have coffee outside on the deck here in Santa Fe. Every moment I get to acknowledge that it's paradise because we do live in a quantum universe where everything is impacting everything else. This is a witness, witness world. So if I notice the bunny and the flower, then in essence, it's witnessing me And I'm witnessing it.
Two nights ago, I dreamed of men and the men that I love. Many of my recent ancestors who are men came into the dream and they were helping me move to the next location. I don't know where I was moving from or to, but I was on the move again. And I woke up wanting to say thank you to all the beautiful, beautiful men in my life. I mostly know beautiful men. I don't know bad men personally.
I don't know who these men are that are doing what they're doing out there, but that's not the men I know, the husbands, the fathers, my cousin that I got to spend time with yesterday with his children. I wish men could know with your whole hearts how much patriarchy is against you and your families and your farms and your food and your water, your plants and your animals. I wish it was easier to see the invisible privilege that you're attached to and to have it become uninvisible and step out of it in a new and powerful way.
But that is the work of lifetimes because even many of the most beautiful men I know struggle with wanting to keep control of the benefits they have. And think that what women are doing to try to control them is a women's issue. And certainly it has its moments.
But so often we are reacting to the power over that we resist and reject. So today I'm just looking at all of it with you observing and feeling being with the great myth of our times and the ghost stories. We're literally fighting ghost stories.
I just can't help but wonder if the ancestors are trying to tell us something. But are we listening? I want to offer my prayers for the suffering, prayers for the end of war and warring, prayers for the cessation of dictatorship ideals running rampant, prayer for no kings.
We pray and we post no matter what else we see happening around us because we weave fabric with a red thread, sacred fabric, no matter what else is happening. Thinking about my dad again. My father wasn't one of the greatest men I know. He was just very lost for a very long time.
He was a man who resisted what life asked of him, care for children, finances and responsibility. He went to his addiction so he could feel more alive. And I have absolute compassion for that. In the end, it was the addiction that got him accidental. Perhaps he's looking over us now and chanting his prayers again.
Perhaps he's moving through his own ghost stories of his past and what it has meant for his daughters to have him complete his life in this way, accidental or otherwise. Through his own shenanigans, he managed not to go to Vietnam, but then was obsessed with war and the history of war. He called himself nonviolent, but he collected war memorabilia, literally guns and knives from past wars, all over his house, mixed with icons of the Blessed Mother and Jimi Hendrix. This photo is me saying prayers at his grave a few weeks ago, sprinkling rose petals and singing the songs to the mother of our ancestors.
Oh, Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us now and in the hour of our need. My ancestors are from largely Ukraine, Ireland, Norway, Finland. So beloveds, I would love to believe that we are at the end of a toxic cycle. A lot of positive minded people are posting that this is the end stage patriarchy.
But for me, it appears we have a long way to go, which means we need to fortify and get ready. May we all continue to nourish ourselves and one another when we are resourced enough. Just your presence is enough, even if you don't know what to say. I really don't. This is my attempt to just connect.
I try to connect with my heart and try to begin with something true. And for those of you who have plenty to say, and you are so proud and so strong, and you're showing up at marches at New King's Day, thank you for your clarity. I'm prepping for a workshop, doing the work in my own way.
Now you might ask, why does it help for me to identify power over structures? And it helps just like it helps to identify where healing is needed, to give a wound a name and a focus to explore its story, to pick at the scab of it a little bit. It's the root of modern therapy to begin to understand what happened and why and try to move on from it, to learn from it, to understand it. While I don't think society as a whole is going to do any patriarchal recovery by choice, that doesn't mean that we individually and in small groups can't do the work ourselves.
I'm naming it with you so that we can identify it. If you're listening, I know you already know. But as we try to understand the impossible, understanding the root cause can be helpful in the personal journey of healing. We must do our own healing work right alongside all of the undoing.
We cannot wait for things to improve to do the personal healing and the healing in small groups and villages. And I persist and insist that healing and being in conversation with small groups of people that you can... Learn to trust is part of where hope is right now.
I fully believe in hope and in humans and in the power of love as the greatest frequency and the greatest truth. May we all remember this great power that is called love that is within us. And I want to quote, close with a quote by a friend of mine who is a beautiful black man educator… He said in a text to me recently, he's feeling the historical burden of male violence. He's grieving. He's saying, I'm sorry about what we've done, are doing, and continue to do against life and love. Life and love, which is our true nature. And so, beloved ones, may we persist in love.
And may those who are in danger find safety. May the prayers of the ancestors move through the ghost stories of the past. May we heed their warnings. May we gather in circles and make our voices heard. And may we always, always be headed toward healing. This is Shiloh Sophia for the Cura Council.
Much love to each one of you.
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